Reflecting on God's Call

(Picture: Rebecca El Khoury and Sister Marla Marie)

By Rebecca El Khoury

“Sister, I am not worthy.” Whenever my father would ask my sisters and I if we thought about becoming a nun, I found myself hesitant and always told him that if God calls me, then of course I would. But deep down in my heart, I always felt that I was not worthy. In my nineteen years, I have not had the opportunity to speak with a nun before, and have only occasionally even saw a nun when visiting the convent of Saint Rafqa in Lebanon. I was very recently blessed to meet Sister Marla Marie for the first time, and in her I saw what had been missing from our Maronite Church here in America: the feminine aspect of our church, a “spiritual mother.” I had questions, and wondered about many things; the one thought that was constantly on my mind was exactly what Sister Marla Marie addressed. When Sister told us how she first realized that God was calling her, and her reply was “Sister, I am not worthy,” it made me realize that like me, she too is human. And that I too, if I open my heart to God, can dedicate my life to Him and serve Him, yet it does not always have to be by taking the path of becoming a nun.

I find myself praying more so that I can listen to God and truly hear what He wants me to do with my life. I realized that unless I open my heart to Him, I may not hear God’s call. I must open my eyes and my heart to listen and see what God truly has planned for me and follow the path that He has written and set before me, whatever it may be.